So close!

Weighed in today, and still had that fleeting fear of "what if this is still just a big sham? What if I'm not really losing weight?"

Well today ... 2 pounds lost. Woohoo!

That's almost 20 lbs. Geeeze. That's crazy. So my next mini-goal is to wear a size 12 comfortably, and my 3rd goal is to be at my halfway point 169.5 lbs (a loss of 33.5).

Crazy!

The Start of the race...

Last week I didn't post my weight-loss results, because they weren't anything to shout about. I didn't gain any, but I lost just .2 pounds. It was a little discouraging. I still live in this land of uncertainty where I'm not exactly trusting that I'm losing weight. It's somehow a fluke. The self-doubt says I'll hit 185 and that's where I'll stay. It's just not in the cards for me to go beyond that number.

Well this morning, I hopped on the scale ... and...

That's a 3 lb weight-loss ladies and gents. THAT IS A QUARTER OF MY WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL! I'm now at 185.8. Which means, this is where the journey really gets going. For the last 3 years or more, I have not dipped lower than the 185 mark. I'm dying to make it there, and I know I can. First mini goal.... make it to 175. That would be awesome.

Valentine's Day

So how does one prepare for a meal of cheesecake and burgers? Working out and planning ahead.

Philip and I are going to Cheesecake Factory to celebrate Valentine's Day. I've already looked up the calories of my meal, to the best of my ability ... Let me tell you Cheesecake Factory doesn't really want you to know where all these calories are coming from so it was a challenge. I had already given myself permission to indulge on certain days... Valentine's Day, Philip's Bday.. etc., but to do so in a responsible way.

Philip and I got up this morning and went to the track, where I attempted to run a mile. Let's just say there was lots of tears and dry-heaving, but I managed to complete the mile in 21 mins. That's with walking a lot and stopping at one point. I think I was pretty frustrated that this just didn't happen like I wanted it to.

We're eating small things for breakfast, nutrigrain bars and kellogg's cereal bars, saving up all our calories for dinner. Hopefully this won't interrupt my weightloss too much, and I've done all I can to prepare for a guilt-less dinner.

Last tip... share dessert. Wish me luck!

And the results are...

O Pounds.

The silver lining ...

Okay probably TMI, but it's that time of my cycle. I didn't think about this before I weighed in, but according to some articles I've read you can gain anywhere from 2 to 4 pounds during that week. So I suppose me not gaining any is a good sign.

Other successes so far in my journey:

1. I feel pretty awesome. I'm not constantly out of breath walking to class.
2. I had to buy smaller jeans this weekend (victory!)
3. My resting heart rate is now at 80 bpm, which is at the top of the healthy range.
4. My blood pressure is steadily going down. On the first reading it's always a little high sitting at 140ish/80, and on second readings it can go as low as 120/70.
5. I haven't ONCE gone over my calories in the last 35+ days.
6. I've consistently worked out at least 3 times a week, and I like it. How about them apples?
7. I have tools now in understanding my body that I didn't have before.

While this morning wasn't a great weigh-in, it could have been worse. I don't ever feel guilty stepping on the scale, because I'm practicing honesty with myself every single day. Next week, I hope, will be better, and I'll see the scale start to move again. If it doesn't, I'll keep plugging along.

Pow!

Weight loss this week 5.8 pounds.